Animosity, it's an atrocity. It's costing me my life.
The hatred that spills the blood of those killed by the knife.
The pooling of blood cooling of skin the faded out light.
We try to escape from pillage and rape to make it alright.
But the time that slips by and the still covered eyes will not fight.
Better to turn blind to the burn then do what is right.
These troubles aren't real since no one will deal and all have lost sight.
No one to stand for the meek and the weak in their plight.

The bitter winds can't touch me now.
I felt their design.
The embrace meant to seperate. It's too late.
I found the path that lead to the garden.
The maze of bushes, and you smiling.
I almost caught you, before I lost you.
Almost saw you one last time.
I tripped on the rotting november roots.
The brush tangled, sticking to my boots.
I found the garden gone.
The bushes seemed to fade.
Turned to brown and passed away.
But there you were on the other side, smiling.
You're on the other side smiling.
It didn't rain like in the stories
And the were no sad long mournings.
Just your funeral in the garden,
and my heart that had to harden.
I still see you, though,
In the coffe shop on winter mornings.
When I'm staring at the park across the street,
You're staring back at me.
I'll go home, home again today.
I'm coming home today.
They found me in the garden,
With the bottle in my hand.
But you and I,
We walk away.

Nat is leaving for Maine.
He'll head on the plane.
Searching maybe for fame.
Now to play the game,
It'll never be the same.

Make it big and don't come home.
Even when you feel alone,
I'll be here waiting by the phone.
Your mind and heart will seem to roam.
Just remember the effort you've already shown,
And the powerful binds you have sown.

Make the time to do it right.
To just let go. To just take flight.
The goals that once were not in sight,
Now take all you like.

We'll be waiting. I'll be waiting.

I stubbed my toe on the curb.
Suddenly I expressed a verb.
The child stared blankly at my face.
I was out of line and out of place.
Appologizing I said sorry.
And left the street in a hurry.
I entered the diner and took a seat.
The same old thing is what I eat.
Cup of coffe, slab of toast.
My paycheck is too small for roast.
Finish off the borrowed news.
Who would mind? It's already used.
Head downtown to get to work.
In the alley someone lurks.
Passing quickly by,
I don't dare say hi.
Close the door to my room.
I got to work none to soon.
An hour late upon the clock.
Another meal they'll have to dock.
I sit for hours drawing blanks.
And for my effort there'll be no thanks.
Finally the art is done.
Just to be tomorrow's fun.
One cheap laugh for someone else,
is not deserved I felt.
This is not the way I hoped to go.
This isn't how I'll leave the show.

I sat there too long this time.
Stagnating in the cold.
Breathing heavy in the wind,
And abandoning my hope.
I'd die again if I could,
But I've run out of rope.
I listen to the petty pleas.
They no longer have a hold.
I stand to walk away,
Just like the times before,
But like those times, I was
Stagnatiting in the cold.
I'm exactly like the ones I hate.
I can recognize my fate.
For others it will be too late,
But I understand the date.
The sip of whine I'll share with death
And the taste and smell upon her breath.
And the time that slipped so slowly by
As I waited, like the sheep, to die.
But, once again, I'm just like them.
Count the hours to the end.
And how can any say it's false
When every one shares every fault.
When each new born is like those breathing,
And those now breathing are like those leaving.
Don't think you're someone else.
That just isn't true.
You are me...
And I am you.

I got one of my friends from yahoo on here y'all. Her name is Karen and I expect you all to be on your best behavior around her.

In other news, My brother is supposed to be comming down soon. I think he's gonna like a break away from that place of eternal darkness... No wait they're calling it Vergennes now, my bad. Anyway he's supposed to be comming for a couple days, so we'll get some hangout time.

Also, I want to mention that everyone who can needs to help out the hurricane effort. Seriously. Bennington's school had a donation pile and truck that we sent down to help out. And now that Rita just hit, the south needs help. I have friends down there, and I appreciate anyone who is making an effort. Thanks ya'll.

Ha. I'll pull you down with me.
Ha. And we'll go underneath.
Now. Swiming in the sea.
Drown. In our broken dreams.

A memory that's failing me there is nothing left to see, and... and when you go at last I'll dwell upon the past. It slipped by all too fast. But hey, what can I say to make you stay with me? Nothing left to offer take the parting gift. I'd give you a ride but you wouldn't want a lift. So you'll have to walk away.

I keep thinking of the times we layed down in the grass. What was that? And as the clouds rolled past, you'd ask for my life. And that was that. I should've just said yes. I should've begged for yes, if you'd take it for a payment.

Ha. I'll pull you down with me.
Ha. And we'll go underneath.
Now. Swimming in the sea.
Drown. In our broken dreams.

I walk out in the sunlight, and take a heavy breath. I can't see past the clouds. And then you're there again, walking across the street. Red dress blowing in the wind, I won't be allright. I see you cross the road. Now you're walking up to me, and as you open up to say...

Ha. I'll pull you down with me, and we'll both go underneath, and as we're swimming through the sea of our broken dreams, at least you'll be with me. At least you would have been with me.

I wrote the letters fashionably, pathetically, aesthetically to make you understand.
Pretty paper burning, I'm yearning, not earning this fate you delt my hand.
But I'll Face the facts of your attacks. I'm just not your kind of man.
But I can still play the band. I won't beg I will demand. I'm your biggest fan.

But you can't see through closed eyes that everything for you is lies. So drown again in my sorrow please. Beg again do you always have to tease? Someday you're gonna see I'll take you there. Sometime you'll be mine and the rest is history.

Pretty paper burning, I'm yearning here. And you don't care it's me, why do I care.
But I'm your biggest fan. I'm your biggest fan. Someday I'll take you there.

Wish I had a sugar coated facade. A fallacy to call my own. She can't see that she's what I want. I can't see how to be what she wants. I'm on the side waiting for a turn but I'll be picked last again. I hate the team, I won't try out again. I can't cry, I can't break down, I can't be that thing. What was it again? I'll never know, and I wouldn't care if I could... could just have that one time. That one facade.

But I'm waiting on the sides again. Waiting to be picked by them. I'm waiting. I won't try out again. And why can't she see. What's inside me. Am I empty, or is it me? Must be me.
Maybe in the years to come I'll fade away and be a memory to her. But I can't... I can't be that thing. I can't forget.

Tomorrow I'll say hi and be just another guy she says hi to on the way by. I would die... Fall down upon my knees I'm begging please, just notice me. It's not that much to ask to just not come in last. I won't ask another thing. Just notice me.Before I'm just your memory.

But I'll be waiting in line tomorrow one more time. And I'll be just another guy. Hi. I'm not that thing, but you see just another guy. I'm not that thing. I won't be just another guy.

I guess I'll submit to the riquirements of being a teen. Allthough I do it with great reservation. I know when you're a teen you pretty much are expected to bitch about everything, but that really never has been my thing. I always figured your problems were pretty much that, yours. I don't push my shit on others so why do they have to bug me?

This one post is the exeption to my standard practice. And I think I get to have it since It's not like I'm bitching to any person, it's just blank space. Otherwise my problems stay with me. So if anyone does read this who has a habbit of backing up their large "shit carriers" and dumping them on people, Stop.

We all appreciate it.
-Shey